Lets take a trip down memory lane as my Woman takes her job more seriously than she takes me. Even with threats of poop on her pillow. At least she's training someone to take over half of her duties today. So since my Empress so lovely demanded a photo of me (thank you!!) we shall go back to 2006 for this photo op.
at 11:12 AM
As the Big Man Cat I get to investigate stuff first. This is a rubber band. (Fear not, the Woman supervised and took it away after this. ) I tried to eat this thing and of course the little wite rat came over and tried to take it for her own. She's so freaking snoopy and nosey. She thinks she has to be involved in everything. Anyhow, here you can see how much bigger I am than her. Hehe
Now I know that you're probably thinking my ridiculous Woman put me up to this. You'd be wrong as the Awesome Man thought it would be funny to try to balance a pillow on my back. This however makes no sense as my back is NOT a table or a flat surface. He laughed while I glared at him. Actually I didn't care- he was touching me so I purred.
at 11:56 PM
Aren't my furs nice and shiny? The VET people even said so last week. I keep forgetting to tell everyone that the VET lady I saw about my ear problem had actually just been to a conference on feline ears. The guy who was teaching it actually told all of the VETs who were there that there is no point in cleaning out waxy ears. If a cat has waxy ears (like me) you should just let us be and not worry about cleaning them-its actually healthier that way. The Woman was sure happy to hear she didn't have to clean my ears and I am too. I hate those pointy cotton sticks. So those of you with waxy ears tell your humans to leave your ears alone.
I hear Latte's been saying that I don't think he's a Man Cat. Well he's certainly not a Big Man Cat, I think you can clearly see that here. The little guy is cute and tiny and I don't think he could be a Big Man Cat even if he tried. He squeaks instead of yowls (Hey, I may meew on my way to the VET but that's all out warfare- I try everything), he is so freaking fragile, and he likes the Woman. Real Man Cats do not like the Woman more than the Awesome Man. That's just crazy. And he likes to snuggle with Kaze. Plus there is only room for one Man Cat in this house and that would be yours truly.
Friends I'm so sorry I haven't commented much. The Woman kept promising "tomorrow" everyday last week. We are following everything, but commenting should resume hopefully this week.
Oh, Happy 10 years together Awesome Man and Woman. I'm happy to say I've lived with you for 8 of them.
I heard you on the phone. I heard you say "cat" "ear" "Chase" "Dr" "tomorrow at 11:40". These things together spell trouble. Yeah my ear is crooked and redish- what of it? No don't touch it!! Stop it, I don't want you looking in there!!!
Its certainly no reason to take me to the stabby place. I swear, if they try to steal my blood I'm saving my poop that I usually give them and pooping on you! And yes, you'd better make sure my Awesome Man is there or I'm going to be BAD. Hissy bad. Growly bad.
So yeah, my day: not going so well. I just know I'll have to have those horrible drop things in my ears and I hate that. They drip and itch and are yucky. Oh and Woman, if you'd clean my ears more often maybe this wouldn't happen? You know I have waxy ears. How about we make it a weekly thing instead of once a monthish?
***Revised Letter to Woman****
Did you not hear my pathetic yet manly mews in the car? Did I not tell you I was FINE?? I do thank you for making sure my Awesome Man was there for me. His presence did make me a bit happier. Now about this PTU thing: I'm not coming out, ever. You have to take the top off or good luck!
Did I not tell you I was FINE?! I told you I was fine and nothing was wrong. What did the VET lady say? That's right, she said I'm fine and nothing is wrong. But I did get gaggy pills and anitbiotics. Great....see what this got me??
And they told me I wouldn't fit into a Speedo!!??? If I knew what that was I'd be offended.
Thank you for returning me promptly to my PTU with KAZE'S PINK SNUGGLE inside. There were comments made. Many comments.
at 9:19 PM
Queen Snickers and Empress win! And Chey and Gemini are 2nd place by 1 minutes so we'll send them a little something special too because we're feeling generous today :).
This is in fact George Washington's Camp at Valley Forge, PA. Wow, what a beautiful site! The Woman is now dead set on taking our horsie out there to go investigate. Talk about vishus deer......there is a herd there that lets you practically pet them!
Woman, I know you're insane. I know you just defy the laws of reasonable humans but this goes to far. Do you realize that its ridiculously windy out there and POURING rain? Oh yes I see that the daffodils are poking there greens above the ground but I wouldn't venture out there to see them- they're green. There are no flowers yet. Just when I start to think she might have some merit I see her do something silly.
We got out on the sun porch this weekend. It was POURING rain on Saturday with crazy crazy wind so it was really nice to sit out the front porch with the AM & the Woman. Of course she brought the flashy box to catch my handsomeness. I found this most pleasing so I allowed her to take pictures of me. I think she does have a talent for catching my handsome sides. But don't tell her I said that.
The Woman was making diner last night and during her slicing of the avacado managed to slice her finger open. Thoughts of Derby's mom's finger flashed through her mind as she oozed blood and told the Awesome Man this was "a 100% EMERGENCY get off the phone!". Whimpering Woman than cried and applied pressure while the Awesome Man rolled his eyes (he was a life guard for years). Being the Woman, she freaked out and made the AM take her to the ER. In the hospital they've never been too (well the AM was actually born there 28 years ago).
They had no idea where the hospital was. They've lived in this town for 3 years. The AM grew up in this town. There really is no excuse for this....
So I know you all think I'm being insensitive to the Woman but you know what they did to her at the ER? Gave her some ointment and a band-aide. And a tetnus shot. Once she got past the front desk she was there for 10 minutes.
Hhahahaahahahahahhaaaaaa! The AM is so embarrassed about the experience he won't even tell anyone they had to go to the ER.
I'm not your average tabby as you can see. First of all, I have a white belly and 4 white paws. Secondly, I have more of a marbled coat than stripped though my tail and front legs have stripes. My furs have three colors on them- black, brown, and tan. This means that every single fur can be seen on every single bean color clothing. Plus I'm very "plush" and my fur is more medium than short length so you can see a single hair of mine from quite a distance. Remind the Woman to vacuum the couch arms if you're coming to visit or you'll be covered in my fur.
Please cast your vote at the Spring has Sprung contest!
Do you know what my Awesome Man did to me? He kicked me in the head! Now he swears it was an accident but it was SO rude. I was just trying to rub on him and give him some love and he moved away and clocked me in the head! Well I showed him, if he doesn't want to take my love, I can just give it to the Woman. She will always let me rub on her and acts like its such a big deal. I should probably be a bit nicer to her in general.